Summer is here

Now that it's June, I need to focus on summer time fun.  Warm weather makes everyone more frisky and ready for fun.  I've got a trip to Vegas scheduled for later this month and I'll be in San Diego in about a week.  I've even got a weekend trip to Mexico this month.  So there's lots of opportunities to get into trouble. 

Here's to more stories that are shameful, hilarious and awesome.

Vegas Again

This year is setting up to be my year of Vegas.  I just came back from my second trip to Vegas this year and I have two more trips to Vegas lined up.  And since I really like Vegas, there's a good chance that I can make it 6 trips this year. 

Since I wasn't able to make anything happen on my last trip to Vegas, I was determined to make something happen on this trip.  I emailed some of the people I'd talked to on my last trip and decided on some guy who looked ok but had the right schedule.  I had passed on him on the last trip but this time I was willing to take a chance.  And taking a chance on him was a risk - he was a dumpy looking white guy with bad teeth. 

This guy turned out to be a good choice.  We talked briefly and then he got right to the business of eating me out.  I didn't have to do anything - just like I requested- and after getting off a few times, he asked me if I wanted to keep going.  I wanted to go to the pool before work, so I told him I was good.  If I'd be more into him, I would have wanted more but I was satisfied.  Not only did I get off with no reciprocation, when we agreed that we were finished, we chatted briefly and then he left.  No awkward trying to drop hints that he should go or standing by the door waiting for him to leave.  It was just like ordering a pizza; I got what I wanted and once I got my needs met, he left.

Unfortunately I didn't have time- really the interest- in meeting anyone else.  Also once I started working, it would have been tricky to shake my co-workers.  I'm going back to Vegas in June for pleasure.  I'll see if I can get a more exciting hook up on that trip.

Are you serious?

As I slowly get back into the limitless pleasures of the booty call, I'm trying to develop a regular one with a kid who works in the same town as my job.  We'd gotten together one time before my trip to Vegas and it was a nice time.  I was looking forward to seeing him a second time and he'd sent me a saucy email about the next time we'd get together.  Since I wasn't able to secure another booty call, I was really looking forward to getting together.

I was supposed to meet my booty call at 7pm but at 7:30pm I was still in the office.  I'm going back to Vegas again for work, so there's a lot of paperwork that needs to be handled before we get there.  I emailed him saying I can't find his address or phone number- both are on my old phone.  He texts me his address and I text back saying that I'll be there at 8.  He texts back saying he'll pass.  What?!  What do you mean you'll pass?  He then proceeds to tell me that it's getting late- late for who grandpa?  And that I'm already a half hour late and he'll be up too late.  Are you fuckin' kidding me?  Who doesn't want to fool around after work?  And we're talking about 8pm on Thursday not 11:45pm on Sunday. 

So I went home without getting my needs met.  I'm not sure if I'm going to see him again.  I mean, he might have had a big project to deal with the next day or was feeling good but whatever.  That's not my concern.  Good thing I'm going back to Vegas to wash this memory away.

Who are you?

One of my favorite places to go is Las Vegas.  And last week my job sent me to Vegas for work.  Since Germany is no longer my boyfriend and I was going to be in Vegas in a nice room by myself, it seemed like a great time for some Craigslist hook ups.  After two years of only having sex with Germany, I'm feeling pretty nervous/unsure about having sex with others.

So to ease back into casual hook ups, I decided to go for something that would require very little from me - getting eaten out.  I had already hooked up with this kid who offered his "excellent pussy eating skills" and wasn't too far from my job.  It was a little nerve wrecking and his skills weren't really excellent  but all I had to do was lay back and enjoy.  And I thought that seemed like a great option for my time in Vegas.

I posted an ad on CL Vegas looking for someone to come over, eat me out and then leave.  Although my post was short, I managed to mention twice that I would not be providing any reciprocation; it's all about me.  There were tons of responses and trying to narrow it down to a few good ones was a daunting task.  But after reading 100's of  emails, I finally found a few guys that I thought were good choices.

I got into Vegas on Sunday afternoon and since I didn't have to work until Monday, I figured I could meet up with someone shortly after my arrival.  I told my co-workers that I scheduled a massage shortly after arriving in Vegas and wouldn't be available to meet me them until dinner.  Against my better judgement, I told one of the guys to meet me in my room.  I know that wasn't the safest choice but I figured what the hell.

I'd just put my suitcase in the closet when I heard a knock at the door.  I opened the door and saw someone who didn't look familiar.  The guy I selected kind of looked like Chris Parnell with grayish hair.  With any charm,  that guy could move from ok to cute.  But the guy who showed up at my door didn't look like the guy in the picture.  He was tall and thin and slightly disheveled.  He looks gross and smelly.  No amount of alcohol was going to make this guy cute or even ok looking.  I let him into my room and started talking to this guy. The whole time I was thinking "who is this guy?"

He starts to tell me some story about getting mugged on a CL hook up and how he's always concerned for his safety.  We're still standing next to the door and I say to him "you don't look like the guy in the photo." He says "yeah that's just a photo I sent out".  What the hell?!  Who does that? I ask him "who's the guy in the photo?" "Some guy I met about 4 years ago" he tells me.  Does the guy in the photo know that he's being used to get hook ups?  As the disheveled guy keeps talking, I keep thinking "I hope he doesn't try to kill me". 

In what feels like a lifetime, he finally finishes talking.  Making sure I'm ready to move quickly, I tell him that I'm uncomfortable, thrown off because he's not who I was expecting and I'm sorry but I can't do this.  Luckily for me he says he understands -he's seen himself, I imagine this happens alot.  So without trying to kill me, he leaves and tries to make a last pitch to get me to change my mind. 

I close the door behind him and then notice that I'm almost out of time for hook ups.  So lame!  I decide I'm going to shake this ugliness off and try to get make something happen during the week.  Unfortunately mother nature had another plan for me- I started my period the next day.  I'll try again when I'm there next month.

"That fucking whore!"

The title is a reference to me and it was something I heard twice in a phone call that was less than 3 minutes long. I'd never been called a "fucking whore" before so it was shocking and upsetting to hear that being said about me. The worse part was it wasn't being said to me so I couldn't even defend myself.

I'd met Germany for dinner that night in hopes of finding out what he couldn't tell me during our last meal. And I'd been thinking about getting laid because: 1) I like getting laid, 2) Germany is good in the sack and 3) I hadn't had sex in a while. Never that two days before I met some kid from CL and let him eat me out; it was just what I needed to get the bats out of the cave. During our meal I was avoiding any questions that might have an upsetting answer for me because I didn't want to be too mad to have sex with him. So mid way through the meal, I say "let's get the rest of this to go and go have sex." Naturally he agreed and we left after finishing the meal.

We go back to his place and while all of the actions are familiar: taking off my shoes, going upstairs, being in his room- it all felt very awkward. Before there can be any nakedness, I tell him my ground rules. The ground rules had been thrown out the window months ago when I thought we were monogamous. After I finish, he sheepishly asks me about kissing. Of course, I say, kissing is allowed. We proceed to have incredible sex and I mean truly incredible sex.

As we're lying there in the afterglow and I hear his phone get a text. I tell him you better see how it is. He says it's his wife and she wants him to call her. I say go ahead. I'm used to her calling while we're together and didn't think anything of him calling her. I knew we'd get back to having sex after his call. He had already asked me what my schedule was like the next day and we were having such a great time.

The warden (his wife) knew he was meeting me and that's when I got the shock of my life. I hear the her say "how was it? Did you have sex?" Germany says it was fine and yes. Then the warden yells "That fucking whore!" She asks another question and he tell her that I'm still there and again she calls me a whore. He says nothing to her as she's yelling at him about both of us and then I hear the phone go dead. After that I decide to go home- there's no coming back from this.

All of the sweetness that was between us was now replaced with ugliness. As I was getting dressed, I looked at Germany and he looked devastated. He said he was sorry and said he wasn't sure why she hates me so much. Unfortunately I do. She thinks I'm going to steal him away from her and that he'll never look back. That was never my intention but maybe I should just to prove a point.

My wife wants to talk to you

In an effort to try and get my head around this cheating business, I've been making Germany take me out to lunch/dinner so we can talk about. Part of me is just interested in getting free meals and making him uncomfortable. Another apart of me really wants to see what's going on here. Let me start by saying that I know even thinking of keeping a cheater is pathetic. But like the old saying goes- nobody does anything until their ready. And right now, I'm not ready to say goodbye.

So I planned to see Germany after work and I had every intention of getting laid because I'm way overdue and don't feel like doing any extra work of finding someone else. Unfortunately our dinner had to change to lunch, so that ruled out my plans for getting laid. So now I'm not getting laid and our table is completely surrounded by people, so weren't able to get into any heavy conversations. During the meal, we talked about mainly random things; I'm traveling for work, I didn't get this job, the weather (!). But every now and then our conversation was worth while.

As we're talking about nonsense, Germany whispers under his breath that his wife is watching to see if I decide to talk him back. When I ask why, he says that we'll have to wait until we're someplace more private for that discussion. I just say ok and move past it. Then he says "she's like to talk to you". Now in the past every time she has wanted to talk to me, I've said no but this time, I was quick to say "Ok". Unlike the times before when I felt she wanted to meet me to punch me in the head or to give me a lecture, now I'm interested in the insight that she has to offer about her husband. We didn't set a time or date for this meeting, therefore I'll just have to wait and see when it's going to happen.

What goes best with confessions?

I've been gone from my blog for more that 6 months, mainly due to the fact that I was dating one person exclusively. Since this blog is about the adventures of a single girl, once I starting having a significant other, it didn't leave me much material for the blog. But much to my surprise there was a situation building that is the perfect topic for this blog.

I hadn't seen Germany the week before and was dying to get laid, so when he said he was at home alone while texting me, I jumped at the chance for him to come over. My place was a mess, so I suggested that I come to him but he was quick to say he'd come to me. BTW, this is kind of a big deal since we live an hour away from each other. When we were on the phone working out the details, he said that he has something he needs to tell me. Naturally in the hour before he arrived at my house, I wondered what he needed to tell me. He's leaving his wife? He wants to break up? He cheated on me? I tried to prepare myself for each of these scenarios.

He arrives at my house and greet him with a kiss. He seems nervous and distracted so I ask him if he'd like a drink. To which he says "what goes best with confessions?" I suggest Tequila or Bourbon because I know from personal experience that a ton of bad decisions have been made by me because of those drinks. As we're sitting next to each other on the couch, he proceeds to tell me that he and his wife are really separating and that he'll have a lot more free time on his hands. So far, so good- why is he being so weird? Then he tells me that he's been cheating on me for the last year. The last year! We've only been dating for two years- what the fuck!!

I almost choke on my drink as I hear this. I immediately think of throwing my drink at him but all I can think is "that's a mess I'll have to clean up". So I put my drink down and start yelling. "Are you fucking kidding me?" "Do you know how many times I had an opportunity to cheat on you? But I thought we were being monogamous." "Thank you for making it so I know have to spend my lunch on Monday getting an STD because I didn't agree to sleep with those people you did!" "You're not the only person who can get laid here- I could make one phone call right now and be getting laid in a half hour." "Do you realize I have a friend who asks me if I'm still dating you every time I see him?"

Much to my surprise, I didn't cry. I'd never been in that situation before but I always thought that kind of information would lead to crying. I was so devastated by the news, that I didn't hear anything he said after that. It was like Charlie Brown's teacher was talking. He was at my house for 5 hours and I tried to ask questions but there was no answer good enough. Lucky for him I was starting to get drunk and tired. At one point I tried to slap him but he managed to move away in time. He also asked me what are you thinking? And I said "I'm thinking about stabbing you".

He finally left my house at 4:30am. He said he was sorry and I watched him walk out as I noticed that I now had the worst stomach pain I'd ever known. That stomach pain lasted for two solid weeks and now has moved to appearing intermittently. We've gotten together to talk twice since then. I'm not really sure what's going to happen next. But I'd be lying if I didn't say that part of me wants to forgive him. Even though I know that makes no sense at all.