Now I've always thought that when people say no reciprocation, they're lying. I couldn't imagine that anyone would make this offer without expecting anything in return. But it turned out that this was a rare case of truth in advertising. I thought Terry was ok looking; kind of like your average soccer dad. Which is ironic because he has two kids that play soccer. Terry is very different from the usual guy I would chose for a BC. He's older than me, has gray hair and has kids. But despite all of those drawbacks, he has been charming me like nobody's business.
I find myself spending the night at his house whenever I see him unless I have to be somewhere early in the morning. Before I leave, he asks me when I'll be coming back. I've seen him as much as 3 days in a row, about 5 times in a week. When I'm not there, I'm looking forward to when I'll see him again. This is a lot of devotion to someone who hesitates to take his clothes off around me. And who seems uninterested in having sex with me. His sole focus is on my pleasure and I love it!
I've been trying to resist his charm but I'm failing miserably. He does every thing I like: he eats me out until I beg him to stop, he kisses me like I'm leaving for a month, smokes me out every time and holds me all night while we sleep. How can I defend myself from that? But vanity keeps me struggling because he could be better looking. One day we went outside to get some food and a beer. I got a good look at him in the light and wasn't that happy with what I saw. As we sat in the bar, the people around us were busy trying to figure out why we were together. In an effort to get a grip, I turned to my friends for advice. Surprisingly, they all said I should give this guy a chance. What?! Shouldn't they be supporting my decision to screw as much as possible?
But now I find that I'm more interested in spending time with Terry. He doesn't ask me to do anything extra (see post on 6/29), he doesn't care if I shave or not, he doesn't care what I wear. He's made it more difficult for me to deal my younger BCs- they are now so annoying. I'm thinking about cutting off my BCs. I don't know if Terry sees other people- I've never asked and don't really think I could stand it if he told me he did. But given his availablity for me, I tend to think he doesn't. I also would feel bad telling him that I see other people. Damn that Catholic guilt!
I guess I'll have to worry about it later; I need to get ready to go to the movies with Terry. We've been doing things outside recently and no matter how much I try, I like Terry.
1 comment:
Hi...ok this sounds stupid but I have a problem and I turned to google because it's the only thing I feel could give me good advice without judging me...then I found your blog, you seem like someone I could relate to.. First I'm gonna brief you on me so youll kinda know some about me. I'm 19 I'm in college and in the army I've been dating a guy for the past two years he's 27 and my parents can't stand him. We've had a very rough relationship I tried to leave him multiple times but have stuck with him because I love his two little girls. I moved in with him and then moved into a dorm for my first semester of college. It was AWESOME but really did a number on our relationship he realized what the distance was doing and picked up and moved to the town my college is in. (it's an hour away from our home town) our relationship got very distant when I first moved here without him and I made some not so very great decisions..one if those not so great decisions was my sergeant..now to my defense ive known Cody(my sergeant) longer then I've known flow(my boyfriend) Cody and I have had basically a social affair for the past 3-4 years. You think of the perfect guy and Cody would come to mind. He's tall, blonde, blue eyes, great smile, great personality, athletic. I could go on and on but that's not the point the point is I've been crushing on him ever since I met him and he has been sweet on me as well...the only problem is he's married..I feel horrible but then again I kinda don't. She's a horrible person!! He deserves so much more. My first semester Cody and I rented a room drank and hooked up for the first time. Ever since then we havnt been able to resist each other..here latly he's been idk different.. Like all this wk for example he's been distant and weve only hung out once. He still shoots me the "I miss you" texts and today was the first time this wk we've hung out. He brought me breakfast and we hooked up and then he had to go to work. Im about 90% sure he's seeing someone else. I want to ask him so bad but we agreed when this all began were just having sex with each other but then sometimes he'll get really mushy and tell me he likes me alot and misses me and don't want to leave whenever he's with me. I'm so confused because I like him and I'm really starting to like him alot. I'm getting mixed signals from him but I'm scared to bring it up. What do I do?!? --twisted life--
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